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Lightning Fill In The Blank

Mar 10, 2018
Originally published on March 10, 2018 7:22 am
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PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now it's time for our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Tara has three. Alonzo and Faith each have four.

SAGAL: Oh, my goodness. OK. Tara, you are in third place, so that means you go first. You ready to play?

TARA CLANCY: Oh, man. Yeah. I'm nervous.

SAGAL: So this is the lightning round. You just got to shout out those answers. If you don't know it...

CLANCY: All right. All right. Anything. Penguins. Go.

SAGAL: Right. Exactly. You've got it.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Give her a point for penguins. Here we go. Clock will start when I begin your first question. Fill in the blank.

CLANCY: All right.

SAGAL: This week, lawmakers in Florida passed a bill that would raise the minimum age to purchase blanks to 21.

CLANCY: Guns.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, President Trump met with blank to discuss the relocation of the U.S. Embassy in Israel.

CLANCY: Netanyahu.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After admitting to an affair with the head of her own security detail, the mayor of blank resigned on Tuesday.

CLANCY: Nashville.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, German Chancellor blank secured her fourth term...

CLANCY: Merkel.

SAGAL: ...In office. Merkel, very good.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the New York Times issued a correction after a story that replaced a reference to millennials with a reference to blank.

CLANCY: Gen Xers.

SAGAL: No. Snake people.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Popular internet browser extension.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: On Wednesday another powerful blank cut power across the East Coast.

CLANCY: Nor'easter.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Sunday, the Oscar for best picture went to blank.

CLANCY: "The Shape Of Water."

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, the big cheese festival in England apologized to attendees for blanking.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

CLANCY: Not having Gorgonzola.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: That was very specific. Would you give her a point?

KURTIS: I would give her a point.

SAGAL: The answer is generally for running out of cheese.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

CLANCY: Come on. I picked the cheese and everything.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: I know she picked the cheese. How can we say? The big cheese festival is held every year in Brighton, England, just one week before the city's equally popular big constipation festival.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Organizers blamed the shortage of cheese on inclement weather, which they say is also responsible for the lack of entertainment, which was supposed to include - and this is true - cheesy DJs playing a selection of jazz, funk and R and Brie.

SAGAL: So clearly, these people cannot be punished enough.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Tara do? I think she did pretty well.

KURTIS: The newbie's the one to beat. She got seven right, 14 more points - total of 17.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: There you go. Impressive. That was impressive, Tara. All right. We flipped a coin. Alonzo has selected to go second. Here we go. Fill in the blank. On Thursday, Donald Trump accepted an invitation to meet with the leader of blank for nuclear negotiations.

ALONZO BODDEN: North Korea.

SAGAL: Right. On Tuesday, lawmakers in West Virginia...

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: ...Approved a pay raise to end a blank strike.

BODDEN: Teacher.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After a contentious 10-day battle, a hotel owner and blank crowbarred off Trump's name from his building.

BODDEN: Panama.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: After passing a giant sign that said - police ahead. Stay off your phone - on Tuesday, 89 people in the same stretch of Vancouver highway were ticketed for blanking.

BODDEN: Calling - using their phone.

SAGAL: Exactly.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: They didn't see the sign because they're on their phone.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: After the FCC overturned Obama-era regulations, Washington became the first state to pass its own blank rules.

BODDEN: Net neutrality.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBTIE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a teenager watching "Black Panther" in the theater...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Reacted to the Michael B. Jordan's shirtless scene by blanking.

BODDEN: She bit down so hard she broke the wire in her braces.

SAGAL: That's exactly right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

BODDEN: Just so you know, Peter, that's a little unfair because black people are required to know everything about "Black Panther."

SAGAL: That's true.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Is there, like, a test every day?

BODDEN: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. You don't want to get a "Black Panther" question wrong.

SAGAL: Oh, absolutely not. So this young lady was watching the movie. And she reacted so strongly to Michael Jordan's scene that she snapped down and broke - it was actually her retainer. And how do we know about this? Well, the girl's orthodontist put a picture of the retainer on Instagram - actually on Tumblr - and said, you're not going to believe this. One of my patients broke her retainer because she was so excited by seeing Michael B. Jordan. And the girl in question saw it. And she basically said oh, my God. That's me.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And then the post went viral. And Michael B. Jordan himself got in touch and offered to pay for the retainer himself.

AUDIENCE: Aw.

SAGAL: After seeing that tweet, the girl had to make an emergency trip to the doctor because her head had exploded.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Alonzo do on our quiz?

KURTIS: So close. Six right, 12 more points. Total of 16 - only one behind Tara.

SAGAL: So how many then does Faith need to win?

KURTIS: Seven.

SAGAL: All right.

KURTIS: Seven to win.

SAGAL: Here you go, Faith. This is for the game. On Tuesday, the Trump administration filed a lawsuit against California, saying their blank laws violate the Constitution.

FAITH SALIE: Sanctuary city.

SALIE: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, it was reported that the State Department had spent $0 fighting blank's election meddling.

SALIE: Russia.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, a government watchdog group found that White House aide blank had violated the Hatch Act.

SALIE: Kellyanne Conway.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: According to new research, bones found 80 years ago in a Pacific atoll likely belong to...

SALIE: Amelia Earhart.

SAGAL: Earhart. Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, David Ogden Stiers, best known for playing Major Winchester on the TV show blank, passed away at the age of 75.

SALIE: "M.A.S.H."

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, English soccer player Sanchez Watt was sent off...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...The field for talking back to an official after a ref asked him three times what his name was, and he repeatedly said blank.

SALIE: Watt.

SAGAL: Yes. That's exactly right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This is how it went. Hey, you, what's your name? Watt. What is your name? Watt. Tell me your name. Watt.

(LAUGHTER)

BODDEN: Third base.

SAGAL: Watt was ejected from the game. And he's giving up soccer for baseball, where this kind of humorous situation could never happen.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Faith do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Faith was one short. So guess who won the game?

(APPLAUSE)

CLANCY: Wow.

KURTIS: Tara.

CLANCY: I can't believe it. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.